8 things about me that won’t improve your day

Kelly tagged me for this one and I love Kelly so I’d better respond. Thanks for the tag, girl!

The meme this time is to give 8 pieces of juicy info about yourself that others might find interesting. I’m not sure how interesting I am, but I know for a fact that I’m not juicy, so we’ll see how this goes!

I’m not a big fan of talking about myself. I’m an even lesser fan of asking myself questions which then lead me to talk to myself about myself. So, for this one I’ll pretend to be someone else interviewing me. Preferably someone with a super sultry lounge-singer voice. And I’m going to be asking a few questions of myself that will hint at some ways I run my business, make money, etc. Enjoy!
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Branding for people who aren’t toilet paper

When I buy toilet paper, I don’t look for the best packaging or logo. I grab the gigantic 6,000-roll pack and call it a day. Toilet paper all ends up in the same place and performs a function that obviates the need for great design and swell packaging.

When I buy staples, I don’t check to see if there’s a mascot on the packaging or if they’re the new Version 2.0 variety. Staples are staples and individuation amongst types and brands means nothing to me.

For such items, branding isn’t really that important. We want 6 billion staples for 12 cents and we don’t care what’s on the box. We want 6,000 rolls of toilet paper for $1.99, regardless of whether or not the package features a talking antelope. As long as the packaging doesn’t have razor blades or dead babies on it, such items are a guaranteed sale.

But you’re not a toilet paper company, are you?

No, you’re not. You sell consulting, or ebooks, or blog posts, or websites, or logos. You do something that, because of your personality and skills and talents, nobody can get anywhere other than from you.

That’s why you need a brand. And that’s why you don’t have to reduce your prices down to a six-pack of toilet paper.

You’re not selling something I can get from any store.

You’re selling something I can only get from you.

The worst website ever built - get yours now!

Photo by FotoDawg

“Because self-denegration is a really good time.”

I want to tell you about the worst site I’ve ever built. Sorry, but I’m not going to give you the address because my reputation as a ~~web designer~~ human being will be shot to hell. But if you think your site isn’t doing so hot, or if you’re worried about your RSS numbers, check this out.

This site of mine has been alive since early 2003. I unveiled it right around 4 years ago. And in that time the site has grown to have a subscriber base of…

…wait for it…

2 people. One of them is me. I don’t even want to know who the other person is.

And guess how many comments there have been for all posts combined over the 4 years the site has been live.

Zero. Not a single comment. Not ever.

As I said, I’m not going to tell you what the site is because it will give you gangrene, but I assure you there’s a reason it only has 1 subscriber. It’s awful.

Now, for some unknown reason, it appears that anyone who ever searches for anything at Google no matter what it is, eventually ends up at my site. And because the site is so unbelievably atrocious people want to get the hell out immediately. And when I say immediately, I mean immediately. Average time spent on the site is a whopping 28 seconds per visit, just long enough to burn your retinas but not quite long enough to contract an STD.

Of course, being the saint that I am, I do my best to provide escape routes, otherwise known as Adsense ads. The site makes me about $10 a month, nowhere near enough to cover my personal shame.

Thank you

“In which Charlie waxes sentimental”

About one month ago this site was brand new and had one subscriber. There are many more subscribers now, although at the moment I can’t tell you exactly how many as it appears the gremlins have gotten into something. Either way, there are way more of you than I ever ever expected.

But the numbers aren’t really what’s important at the moment. Right now it’s all about you.

Over the past thirty days or so, I’ve made some great friends and received more kind emails and comments than I ever expected to get. I’ve even spoken with a couple of you on the phone, and thus have come to learn that the divide between “stranger” and “friend” is a thin one.

I want to tell you all with deepest gratitude that you have made this endeavor very much worth the effort. You have made designing and running this site a pleasure and a dream come true for me.

This would just be another website amongst the millions of others if it weren’t for the human element Ye Olde Readers bring. It would just be another project and some bits of code without you all. But I have come to love this site for what you have helped make it, and for that I am at your service.

Ignite Living is as much yours as it is mine. Thank you for everything you’ve helped it become.

Charlie

You’ll like what Ignite Living has planned for 2008

party hat I’m sure I’m supposed to whip out some fancy metaphors here about it being a new year. That’s what writers do. Unfortunately all I can think of to say is that 2007 was good and 2008 will be even more gooder.

But that doesn’t do much good for you readers does it? You probably just want to know if this site will be helpful to you over the next twelve months or if it will continue to be a complete waste of your time. It’d be easier to go with the latter. Then I could write all those fancy posts I’ve been thinking about, like my series on 1001 craft ideas for elbow macaroni.

As much fun as that might be, the one thing I’ve liked the most since starting this here blog is the people. Every new comment makes me smile; every time the RSS subscriber numbers rise I feel like I’m doing something to impact the world around me. I’ve made some great friends in the very short time Ignite Living has been breathing, and that has inspired me to make sure it breathes on.
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Some poor schmuck just lost $77

I just passed up buying a $77 ebook. The funny thing is I really wanted it.

I still do. The sales letter made the book look very interesting and I might have learned something from it had I bought it.

But I didn’t and the reason why is because the sales letter was full of mistakes, punctuation errors, misspellings and awkward grammar.

What’s sort of interesting about this is that the “sales” part of the sales letter was great. The AIDA (Attention, Interest, Desire, Action) formula was in place. All the bullet points were great. It told me a story and sucked me right in. And even though I figured it was just like the other 4,239,123 ebooks that were published today, I still wanted it.
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The job interview that never was

Shane from Shane & Peter forced this one on me. Okay, he really didn’t. He didn’t even ask. But on their site he’s posted a series of questions which I’ve answered here. It’s a sort of mock interview game and is a good glimpse into the lives of freelancers/entrepreneurs.

As this is a relatively new blog and I’m a relatively new blogger, this is a great way to bust out of obscurity and get to know some of you.

Unless you don’t want to know me. In which case I’ll keep the paper bag on my head.
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